The Quarterback Enigma (Or Other Some Such Lofty Title as is Deserving of a Ball-chucker)

That's one old QB.
Photo by Daniel Garcia Peris.

What an elusive role, the linchpin of not only a team and playing style, but a whole organization. Who would the Colts be without Peyton Manning? Hell, who would Indianapolis be without the Mr. Rocket-Arm? A bunch of fucking yokels who would have Jim Harbaugh acting as back-up and mentor to Ryan Leaf, and if that doesn't sound like a pro-football nightmare then I don't know what does. (By the way, that tandem did get an NFL chance with the Chargers, resulting in a predictable one win season (Don't worry Niners fans, Harbaugh went 8-8 the year before so he's not the pathetic douchefart)).

But it's not even the top tier of quarterbacks that I care that much about, not until one of them is on the Skins. It is rather, the unknown, what some would call the intangible element to quarterbacking that I enjoy, not the super-powered receiver-tracking arms of the top tier of 4K throwers, but rather the abilities to rush an opening, to know when to throw away a ball and when to take a hit, to inspire and inform teammates, that I enjoy.

However, this is not the main ingredient to a successful quarterback, rather what a successful quarterback needs to win the Superbowl, so in my time as a fan of the Redskins and a close observer of the 49ers and Raiders, I seen plenty of interest but no payoff. What the hell? Why can't these bastions of potential and intangible glory live up to their elevated statuses as Future Gods of the Game? Because that is not how the NFL works, in fact, the NFL is about work itself, work is required by every position but most of all the QB who must act as the brain of an offense, being able to recognize and dispatch defensive ploys immediately while making plays. This takes a very developed mind that has been honed over years for the split second decisions that such a position requires on the professional level. I mean, Jeff Garcia was the last good QB the Nners had and he didn't make it to the league until he was twenty-nine, putting in a good amount of time in the CFL before he became a 4k thirty-and-ten kind of guy.

A blurry and useless Alex Smith, as usual.
Photo by Dinur Blum.

Also, unfortunately, contract size is not directly relative to playing skill, a faux pas committed upon by the Redskins with nearly every damn quarterback that rolls through the town of continual quarterback controversy. Dan Snyder can't keep his hands in his pockets long enough to let a single QB develop with a single Offensive Coordination (a la Jason Campbell) and if he does get someone with some appreciable skill that skill is denigrated by both the giant contract said player received and the inherent pressure that comes with such a contract (a la Mark Brunell). Then you have the guys that consistently over perform in the preseason, just enough to waste about half or more of the regular season during which they habitually under perform (look at Alex Smith for the Niners, Rex Grossman for the Bears and Skins). Then you have the out-and-out failures, peoples whose stars were so bright but could not stand out due to injury or plain stupidity (the Raiders have most of these sad stories, take a look at Jamarcus Russell, Daunte Culpepper, Kerry Collins, the list is fucking endless).

While the position itself is layered, complex, and difficult to ascribe to any particular style of winning, this is what makes it interesting. Sure, sports today are becoming offensive clusterfucks with no tackles and no returns, but one can see why through the daily drama and intrigue that surrounds a position as enigmatic as that of the quarterback.

P.S.: I got so wrapped up in Bay Area QB history I forgot to mention the reason why I started writing this post: John Beck is the projected starting QB for the Redskins this season. Uh.... whaaaaaaaaa?